There are so many unknowns in our life right now. I am constantly imagining what the future might look like. A house, kids, family and friends around my table. I want to not be living in a hotel. I want my pharmacy job back. I want, I want, I want. As I wallow in what I don't have and covet the lives of my friends on Facebook, I realize there is a deeper issue at hand. I am not content with the life God has given me right now. I'm telling God that what I have is not enough.
And let's not forget how impatience I am at waiting for our "real life to begin." Waiting for Chick-fil-A to call...waiting to start a family...I'm not so good at waiting.
This journey may be hard, but I have SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR! New friends we never would have met except in the IM program. The cool places we have seen. Eight months we lived at the beach. The fun adventures on the road. This wonderful company that has provided for us. No house to worry about or fix. No kids waking me up in the wee hours. And so much more.
I don't want to just be thankful for the gifts, but I want to be thankful for the giver himself. Thankful for a God that is loving and caring. Mighty. A defender of the weak. Righteous and holy. Thankful that Jesus died on the cross to save me.
This discontentment and impatience ultimately lead me to Jesus. I was not created for this world. I was created to sit and worship at the feet of Jesus. That day is coming and that is why I will rejoice in these hard times. Jesus' death on the cross has made a way for me to be reunited with God. I put my hope in him and look forward to the day of no more wanting and no more waiting. I'll be with my heavenly Father and OH THE JOY THAT WILL BE!
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